I have been married and divorced a few times, but I have held onto many of the ex-family members. So, now I have relatives, step-children, siblings and adopted siblings ( the same thing, in my mind), children, parents, step-parents, in-laws, ex-in-laws, a husband, and an ex-husband to count among my family. They are my most prized possession(s).
The voice in my head never stops. I don’t mean that I hear crazy voices, but that inner voice that guides and leads one through life. My inner voice is always thinking, projecting, acting, wondering. I’m not ADD or ADHD, just a Type-A personality. I always have several projects going on at once, plus a running list of ideas for future projects. I want to write a book, several books. I want to start a business. I want to improve my knowledge. I want to read this book or that book. I am always keeping busy and have a difficult time just being.
I am always doing two things at once. If I am “relaxing” in front of the television, I am also on my iPad playing a game. If I am in the car as a passenger, I am usually completing a crossword puzzle. If I am at work, I am listening to a webinar, checking email, discovering or researching genealogy, and testing out new software. If I am at the beach, I am usually reading or walking.
Luckily I am very organized and live and die by my To-Do List, as I’ve mentioned in earlier posts. I have always been this way; but, I feel like my life is getting away from me before I can actually get any of these larger, life-changing tasks completed.
As I look back at my life, I can’t believe that I am so old already. Where has the time gone? What have I done with my life so far? When will I ever be able to start that business that I want to start? When will I write that book that will make me the next “great american author”?
It will come. I know will all come to pass. I am just not a very patient person and want it to happen NOW.
Today’s challenge is to write generally about “lost and found” and/or continue on with the loss theme.
I have been married three times. I find it hard to believe myself sometimes, but that is the hard truth of it.
The first time I married I was only 25 years old. I say only 25 years old because I found that I changed tremendously during my 20’s, so much so that I had completely different wants, needs, and desires by the time I turned thirty. I was young and didn’t think I wanted children, and so, I married a man who also didn’t want children. I was wrong. By the time I turned 30, I realized something was missing in my life and it was children. It is strange how the tick of that biological clock suddenly becomes an alarming thump. He still didn’t want children, but that was okay, because I found that I really didn’t want to have his children anyway. A harsh truth. I had changed so much that I didn’t even really like this guy very much anymore. I really don’t know what happened or why, but we divorced amicably and that was that. My first serious relationship loss.
I remarried again about three years later, to a wonderful man who was sweet, generous, and loving. We had two beautiful children together and he is a great father. But, he didn’t like getting up in the middle of the night with the children when they were babies. I worked second shift and it wasn’t easy for me to continually get up during the night and then get up at five or six in the morning when the baby woke up for the day. It became a grueling routine for me and I became angry, lonely, and depressed. Somehow, we managed to have another baby, but the routine started all over again. We were growing apart and I was growing angrier and angrier. We separated and divorced and it was horrible, ugly, and filled with anger and mistrust. This was my second relationship loss. Luckily, the one thing we did agree upon was that we would get along when we were together with the children, and that worked out very well. We actually have become very close friends and both feel that we get along better now than we did when we were married.
I remarried for the third time about two years after that divorce. I have finally found the perfect man who loves me for who I am, who lets me be me, and who loves my children unconditionally. He allows me to explore different facets of myself without question. He takes care of all of us, as well as his own children, without a fuss, without blinking an eye. He is generous, loving, sweet, kind, I could go on and on. He even gets along with my second husband. What more could I ask for?
So, after two marriages where I lost myself and the relationship, I have finally found myself and the love of my life. AMEN!
Today’s assignment is to “pick up the nearest book and flip to page 29” and find the first word that jumps off the page, and then use this word as your springboard for inspiration. The twist: write the post in the form of a letter. I am going to skip the twist and move on to the inspiration.
Interestingly enough, the first words that jumped off of the page were “hands-on experience“. I have written many cover letters over the years and have used this trite expression myself. It’s almost impossible not to use a term like this in a cover letter or resume, even if it is just implied.
I, like many people, learn better by actually doing the task–the job, the research, the writing, the whatever–myself. In my opinion, I believe employers look for just such a term in a cover letter because it conveys not only what type of learner you are, but it can also convey a sense of honesty, a sense of self-knowledge; but, I could be wrong.
As an instructor, I have found that there are three different styles of learners:
- Those who learn by listening,
- Those who learn by seeing, and,
- Those who learn by touching/doing /interacting
The best way to learn, and more importantly to remember something new, is to do all three. That is one of the reasons teachers encourage students to take notes during class. The idea is that you listen to the teacher, write down the most important aspects of the topic, and then attempt to master that topic by practicing it on your own–aka hands-on experience. Taking notes has become a lost are in my opinion, and is a topic for another day.
Anyway, hands-on experience is essential. You either have it, or you need it.